Should Or Choose
So many people talk about Shoulds. Should’s are things that we think we need to do but usually don’t really feel motivated to do. I Should exercise more. I Should eat better. I Should study more. I Should have more friends. I Should be married by now. These Should’s come from parental expectations, societal expectations, or social comparisons that we make. Even if we make a plan to accomplish a Should it rarely sticks because we haven’t bought into it. The fix is to replace the word Should with Choose. Choose is empowering and indicates ownership while Should is restrictive and feels like it is being forced on us.
- Recognize some of the Should’s in your life and help your family to do the same
- Then choose one of those Should’s to work on first.
- Replace the word Should with Choose
- For example change I Should study more for the SAT because my parents want me to, to I Choose to study for the SAT because I know the only way to get to into University of Florida and become a Gator is to have a good score on my SAT.
- Talk about how the word Choose makes it a personal decision rather than an obligation
- Then create an action plan for success and Choose to stick to it.
